Viva Las Suckas
by element115
Summary: The A-Team pities a group of Las Vegas kidnappers.


"I'm not sure I'm in the mood for Italian," Murdock said, as B.A. pulled the van into the parking lot of the restaurant. "Besides, there's like twenty different 'Tonys Pizza' restaurants in town and they all say they're the original."

"If your fault we're here, sucka," B.A. grunted. "If you'd-a thawed out the meat like I told you, I'd be cookin' right now."

"You know B.A., you should be more sensitive to my needs. Maybe I have A.D.H.D.?"

"Or maybe you a F.O.O.L."

"It doesn't matter guys," Hannibal said, pointing at the sign. "They're closed."

"Closed?" said B.A., shocked. "This is their busiest night of the week!"

"Not tonight," Face said. "The parking lot's empty."

"Somethin' ain't right, man," B.A. said, stopping the van. "We better go check it out."

Tony was sweeping the floor when he heard the knock at the door. "Go away," he said. "We're closed!"

"It's B.A.!" shouted the gruff voice from the other side. "And I'm hungry!"

Tony went to open the door.

"What's goin' on Sam?" said B.A., as Tony held the door for the four to enter then locked it behind them. "This parking lot's usually full!"

"I can't run this place alone, B.A."

"Alone? Where's your brother Sam?"

"I wish I knew."

"He's disappeared?" Hannibal asked.

"He was kidnapped" Tony replied angrily.

"Who'd wanna do that?" B.A. said. "Sam doesn't have any enemy in the world!"

"He didn't, until a few weeks ago, when we were approached by some thug working for Tommy Armone."

"I know that name," Face said. "He's connected with a local crime syndicate. He's got his hands in all kinds of dirty operations."

"They told me Tommy wanted to buy my property, but I didn't want to sell. I turned them down again and again, until finally they kidnapped Sam, and told me if I didn't sell, they'd kill Sam. Now I've got no choice."

"You gonna give up?" B.A. said. "Just like that?"

"What else can I do?" Tony said.

"You can kill a rat" Hannibal said, lighting a cigar, "but another one will be right behind it, unless you find the nest. What you need is a good exterminator."

"Are you crazy?" Tony said. "You can't take on these guys!"

"Goons like Armone operate on fear. They find something you value and then threaten it. But you don't realize that they're after something too. And I don't think it's a burning desire to enter the pizza business. If we can figure out what it is, maybe we can get your brother back, and turn the tables on these low-lifes."

"You really think you can stop these guys?"

"We'll do more than stop 'em," B.A. said. "The next pizza these suckas eat'll be through a straw."

"Of course, we'll need to discuss a fee," Face said.

"I've got money," Tony said. "If you can get my brother back, you can name your price."

"Salud, Tony" Hannibal said. "You've just hired the A-Team."

* * *

Early the next morning, two sharply dressed Italian were driving around a lengthy black Cadillac through the neighborhood when something caught the passenger's attention.

"You believe this freakin' guy over here?" said the Boss, pointing to someone outside as he he spoke to his Underling. "Pull over ..."

The car pulled up to the edge of the street, where a boy and girl had set up a lemonade stand.

They got out and walked to the stand.

"You want some lemonade, Mister?" said the boy.

"You got a permit for this stand, kid?"

"A permit?" the boy said, confused.

"This property is owned by Tommy Armone."

The kid turned around and looked at the property. "But it's nothing but an empty lot!"

"I don't matter kid. If you ain't got no permit, you're outta business. Beat it."

Suddenly B.A. emerged from behind the stand.

"Why don't you pick on someone your own size, sucka!"

The Underling ran at B.A. with a baseball bat. B.A. grabbed the baseball bat with his left and punched the thug in the stomach with his right. Once the thug was hunched over, B.A. picked him up and threw him several yards into a trash can.

The Boss pulled a pistol on B.A., but before he had a chance to fire, the van squealed to a stop at the curb, and Hannibal jumped out, aiming a machine gun at the thug. Face and Murdock quickly followed.

"Drop it!" Hannibal said. The Boss dropped his pistol. Hannibal nodded at Face to search him for any weapons.

"We want to know who wants this property, and why," Hannibal said.

"Forget it," the Boss said.

"You got two choices Jack," B.A. said, cupping his fist. "You talk, or you hurt."

"Forget it, you'll never get me to talk."

"This is interesting," Face said, showing Hannibal a matchbook which he had inadvertently pulled out of the Boss's pocket.

"'Imperial Resort'," Hannibal said, reading the logo on it. "That's that giant new casino hotel in Las Vegas. Guys, I think we could use a vacation."

Face nodded, "If we're going to get to Vegas quickly, we'll need to ..." B.A. shot him an angry look. "... fill up the van with gas and check the oil."

Hannibal turned back to the Boss. "Now, why don't you go crawl back under your rock, and take the trash with you. And tell the snake in charge to slither out of this neighborhood if he doesn't want to get stomped." Hannibal motioned with his gun, and the Boss quickly dragged his Underling back to the car and drove away.

"Thanks Mister," said the boy to B.A. "How about a free glass of lemonade?"

"No thanks, kid. I only drink milk. It's good for the bones."

* * *

"I pity the fool!" Murdock growled the following morning at the V.A. Hospital, as he placed his pasta re-creation of B.A. next to his renditions of the other three.

The phone rang. "Room service?" he answered. "... Sure thing, what channel? ..."

Murdock turned on the TV to see live coverage of the black van being pursued by a phalanx of green MPs. "Uh oh ..."

"We're going to have to push the plan ahead of schedule," Hannibal said, who was in the passenger seat, being eyed by B.A. suspiciously.

"Hang tight, Colonel," Murdock said. "Oh by the way, I ran out of fettucini, so I had to make you out of linguini."

"I love it when linguini comes together," Hannibal said, hanging up.

"_Linguini_?" B.A. said. "Was that Murdock? You didn't tell me about no plan! I knew that road led to the aeroport! You was tryin' to get me on a plane!"

"B.A.", Face said, "Don't you think you should focus on the problem at hand?"

"Shut up, Faceman! It's your fault we in this mess! I knew we'd get spotted if we took the freeway!"

"What was I supposed to do? We had to take a shortcut so we wouldn't be late for our ..." B.A. shot him an angry look. "... dentist appointment."

"You gonna need one sucka," B.A. said, "soon as I stop this van, I'm a bust your jaw so you don't give no more bad directions! And if the MPs lock me away, I'm-a come back in 30 years and bust it again!"

"Pull off here, B.A. ..."

"Airport exit! I knew it!"

"That's what I want Decker to think," Hannibal said. "If there's one place to lose things, it's an airport. It's all part of my plan."

"It better be," B.A. said, "or you can start plannin' your funeral!"

B.A. pulled into the airport complex, weaving and dodging the pursuers until the van found its way down a road toward a runway.

"B.A.", Hannibal said, "Putting out his cigar, "This is going to hurt me more than it hurts you." He grabbed the wheel.

"What you doin', sucka?" B.A. said frantically.

The van veered off toward a concrete barrier at the side of the road, as B.A. shouted "_HANNIBALLLlllll ..._"

Sparks flew as the van crashed into the barrier and eventually came to a stop.

The MPs approached slowly, guns drawn, but all they could see was the puffy white of the inflated airbags.

"Come on out, Smith," Decker said, "We've got you surrounded."

After a moment of silence, Captain Crane withdrew a shiny sewing pin, and Decker nodded at him.

Crane approached and popped the airbag, but it deflated to reveal that the vehicle was empty.

Somewhere at the other end of the complex, Hannibal, Face and B.A. suddenly emerged from under a tarp on the back of a luggage tram.

"Thanks for the lift," Hannibal said to the the orange-clad driver, but he couldn't hear anything through his ear protectors.

They casually followed a crowd exiting a plane into a terminal, then made their way out to a central area where there were some stores.

Hannibal waited until the right moment, then nodded to Face.

"Say," Face said, pointing, "When they did they put that jewelry store in?"

B.A. looked in the direction Face was pointing, then Face picked up a vase and broke over B.A.'s head, hoping to knock him out, but was unsuccessful. B.A. turned to Face angrily.

"Nice try, sucka," B.A. said. "Let me show you how it's done."

Face stepped back nervously as B.A. walked toward him angrily, but B.A. inadvertently slipped on a banana peel and fell backward onto a baggage cart. The baggage cart then rolled across the ground to a luggage conveyer belt. As the cart knocked against the conveyer, a large piece of luggage fell over and knocked B.A. out.

Face casually picked up the luggage put it back on the belt, as Hannibal pushed the cart back out to the runway, where Murdock waited with a private jet.

"I don't think he's gonna fit in the overhead," Murdock said as Hannibal and Face lifted B.A. onto the plane.

"_We_ will when he wakes up," Face said.

Within moments the plane was skyward.

* * *

B.A.'s head nearly touched the roof of the sub-compact rental as he peered through binoculars across the lot of the Imperial Resort.

"I'm-a kill that sucka for shooting me with a poison dart and leaving me in the desert!".

"I'm just glad we found when we did," said Hannibal from the passenger seat as he looked back nervously at Face and Murdock.

"There he is," B.A. said, as he pointed to the front entrance, where Tommy Armone stepped out, flanked by two of his men.

"All right guys, let's go," Hannibal said. "Be inconspicuous, but stay close. We've got to find out what kind of business he has with this hotel."

Inside, Tommy walked past the hotel lounge, then walked toward the elevator.

Hannibal, dressed as a mariachi singer, spoke into a mike on his lapel. "B.A., he's heading your way ..."

The elevator opened a few moments later on a floor of luxury suites. Tommy and his men stepped out and walked to their room. B.A. stood behind them, dressed in an Elvis costume with wig and sunglasses. "Room 2217," B.A. said.

"I'm starting to get impatient," Tommy said a few minutes later to Douglas Baron, real estate mogul and owner of the Imperial Resort. "I've been buying up property left and right. You keep telling me we're going to make a killing, but I haven't seen a dime."

"That's because you're not seeing the bigger picture," Douglas said. "Every day of thousands of people go in and out of this casino, but there's a whole demographic missing."

"What, you mean seniors? Walk by the slot machines."

"No you twit, I mean kids!"

"You must have a screw lose!" Tommy said. "This is where my money's goin'? Kids can't go the casino!"

"Whoa, nobody said Casino! I'm talking about ..." He pulled the tarp off an elaborate model of a colorful building with a rotating cartoon character on the roof. "... HappyFunLand!"

"I see them," Murdock whispered to B.A. Murdock's eye peered out through one of the windows of the model. They had gone to the floor below, and found a special room underneath the elaborate model, through which Murdock could step onto B.A.'s back and see outward. "Quit moving around B.A., I'm losing my balance!"

"You gonna lose teeth if you don't shut up, fool!"

"That's great," Tommy said to Douglas, "But what does this have to do with a casino?"

"We may not call it a casino. Instead of slot machines and card tables, there are skill cranes and wack-a-moles. But the result is the same, we bleed the little runts dry 1 dollar at a time, and by the time they're old enough to gamble, they'll be on the first plane to Vegas. The Imperial Resort will be bigger than ever! But HappyFunLand won't happen until you can finish buying up the property!"

"Tony's Pizza is the only property on the block we don't own."

"Good, we'll be able to start construction. But HappyFunLand will need a parking lot. What's your progress on the next block?"

"We own almost all the property there, too. The only businesses left are a gold jewelry store, a dairy distributor, and some youth center."

"_What_?" B.A. shouted as he jumped to his feet. As he did so, he inadvertently pushed Murdock up through the model, so that Murdock's head occupied what used to the be the cartoon character.

Tommy and Douglas stared at Murdock incredulously.

"Room service?" Murdock said nervously.

Tommy grabbed a violin case.

"Music lover, eh?" Murdock said. "B.A.!!!!"

B.A. pulled Murdock down and the four scrambled away just as Tommy aimed a machine gun into the hole and fired.

A few stories down, the four emerged at a parking level.

"I looked out the window at the landing," Face said. "They've got the exit blocked."

"I figured they would," Hannibal said. "Face, you come with me. We'll create a distraction. B.A., you and Murdock get down to the lot, grab the first set of wheels you can find. Meet us in the back lot."

Out in the alleyway, an armed thug wearing a suit and sunglasses opened a door, and allowed a number of thugs to enter the building to sweep for the intruders.

After the thugs were inside, the door was closed behind him. A few moments later, B.A. and Murdock slid out through a garbage chute into the dumpster next to the door.

Murdock looked at B.A., covered in stinky trash, as they crawled out of the dumpster. B.A. glowered at him. "Don't you say nothin'!"

Hannibal and Face stepped out of the stairway onto a lower level of the parking structure to see a flashy parked motorcycle.

"They'll never miss us on this," Hannibal said.

"How reassuring," Face answered with a plastic smile.

Hannibal pulled a pistol and got onto the rear seat. "I'll take shotgun."

"I don't know how to ride one of these!"

"Well you'd better learn quick Lieutenant," Hannibal said, nodding toward the stairway where the thugs were arriving at the landing. "Cause' we're comin' in hot."

Face got onto the motorcycle and started it up. As soon as Face pressed on the accelerator, however, the motorcycle quickly went into reverse and crashed through the wall behind them, into the casino.

Face looked into the rear view mirror to see people diving out of the way. He saw that they were heading toward one of the game tables and turned to the left to avoid it, but it didn't occur to him that since he was looking in the mirror, turning left would turn him to the right. He inadvertently turned toward a stairwell.

The motorcycle made its way down a bumpy stairwell, finally landing in the elegant lobby of the hotel. Face had hoped to steer toward the front entrance, but the thugs were waiting for him there. They immediately opened fire. Hannibal returned fire, but it was fruitless.

"We're outnumbered, Face! Better take evasive maneuvers!"

"You mean like driving forward?"

Face swerved the motorcycle around the base of an elegant fountain and steered the cycle into a hallway which appeared to be unoccupied. He quickly discovered however that it came to a dead end.

"Hit the brakes!" Hannibal said.

"If I knew where the brakes were, don't you think I'd have hit them by now?"

With nowhere to go, Hannibal and Face braced themselves as they hit the wall at the end of the hallway. The motorcycle smashed through to the daylight into the alley, where it finally came to a halt as it crashed into a stack off crates containing live chickens. The chickens scrambed to freedom, several landing on the hood of the car in which B.A. and Murdock drove.

"Stop the car!" Murdock said frantically as he grabbed the wheel. "You'll kill the chickens!"

"Let go, fool!" B.A. said as Murdock turned the wheel, and the car crashed into one of the mobster's black Cadillacs.

B.A. and Murdock got out to find Hannibal and Face brushing white feathers off themselves.

"See?" Hannibal said to Face, as the mobsters surrounded them, guns drawn. "Piece of cake!"

* * *

The four were quickly escorted to a storage room, where the mobsters ushered them inside and locked the door behind them.

"Leave 'em in there until sundown," Tommy said. "Then toss 'em in the trunk and take 'em to the desert ... bury 'em in the luxury suite." The thugs laughed. "That one never gets old," Tommy sighed to himself as he walked away.

Sam sat on a crate in a darkened corner when the four entered, and excitedly jumped to his feet.

"B.A.!"

"We here to rescue you man," B.A. said. "We'd be on our way to back to L.A. if it wasn't for this fool and his chickens."

"It's a long story," Hannibal said. "But don't worry. We could sleepwalk out of this place. The question is, what do we do about this Douglas Moneybags and his mob cronies? If we don't put the brakes on this GoodTimeLand, I'll be staring at a giant spinning rodent every time I get off the freeway."

"Actually Colonel, it's 'HappyFunLand'," Murdock said.

"It's gonna be PainLand for the first sucka that messes with that youth center."

"I've got evidence that can put these guys away," Sam said. "These guys have been toting me around for months, and I've managed to gather evidence every chance I can get. I've got photocopies and taped phone calls of everything from bribing zoning boards to shifting accounts around to crooked contractors. It's all in a P.O. Box nobody knows about, but I've got to get out of here."

"What do you think, B.A.?"

"There's propane in this tank," B.A. said, twisting a nozzle to make it hiss. "I could use it to make a blowtorch. With that Schwinn and those desert carts, I should be able to build a war machine."

"I love it when a plan comes together," Hannibal said, as he put a cigar in his mouth.

"No!" everyone shouted, as Hannibal flicked his lighter, immediately igniting the propane, causing a massive explosion.

"Don't worry, guys!" Murdock shouted through the smoke as he grabbed a fire extinguisher from the wall. "I'm _on_ it!"

Murdock wasn't prepared for the pressure the extinguisher would exert, and his wiry body flailed about, spraying the extinguisher fluid all over the room.

The door opened and a thug entered the room, but he immediately slipped on the extinguisher fluid, fell flailing backward, and knocked down the thugs who were following close behind like dominos.

"Let's move!" Shouted Hannibal, who still had a imploded cigar in front of his char-stained face.

The five stepped over the thugs on the floor and made their way to the landing. There were two stairways, winding around each other to in opposite directions. As soon as they stepped out into the landing, the saw more thugs running up the stairs toward them.

The five quickly ran up the stairs, passed the landing on the next floor so that they were out the sight of the thugs, then they hopped the railing to the opposite stairway, going downward, just before the thugs made it to the landing the five had just been on. By the time thugs continued up the stairs to the upper level, the five were on the other stairway heading down to to the first floor.

The five eventually made to the first floor and went out the exit. They found that they were at the edge of golf course. Parked near a greenhouse was a golf course with a trailer attached to the back.

"It'll have to do," said Hannibal, as he got into the driver's seat.

"What you doin', sucka?" B.A. said. "_I'm_ drivin'!"

The thugs filed out of the exit door to see the five driving away on the golf cart.

The thugs jumped into two other golf carts that were nearby.

The first cartful of thugs approached close to the the Team's cart and tried to shoot out the tires, but B.A. barely avoided them.

"B.A., drive thorough the gap in the trees!" Hannibal shouted.

The cart quickly turned and zoomed through some trees.

The thugs followed and when they reached the other side, the found themselves on a tennis court.

When the thugs regained sight of the A-Team, they saw Murdock on the trailer of the Team's cart standing behind a tennis ball serving machine which he'd lifted onto it.

The thugs were immediately pelted with a rapid fire of tennis balls.

One of the balls hit one of the thugs in the eye and he lost control of the cart. The cart slammed into a pole that suspended the tennis net. The thugs quickly dived away from the vehicle as it exploded in slow motion.

The Team pulled out of the tennis court and were back on the rolling hills of the course.

The second cart full of thugs rapidly approached.

"Uh oh Colonel," Murdock said, looking at the sputtering serving machine, "I don't think we've got the balls."

"Speak for yourself," Hannibal said. "B.A., head toward that hill. And step on it."

"What?" B.A. said angrily. "We gonna land in that pond!"

"No we won't," Hannibal said. "We'll make it to the other side."

"You're crazier than Murdock!"

"He's right B.A.," Murdock said. "In the movies, the good guy always makes it across, only the bad guy lands in the water."

"Can't argue with that logic," Face said sardonically.

B.A. speedily mounted the hill, but instead of jetting in the air, the cart quietly drove into the water until the five were submersed, disappearing completely from sight. Bubbles floated up to the surface.

Under the water, the cart gently landed on the floor of the pond, amid a garden of golf balls. They swam out of the cart. Bubbles floated from B.A.'s flared nostrils as he pointed at Hannibal and Murdock, then made a fist.

Hannibal pointed in the direction of some weeds, motioning for them follow.

Meanwhile, the thugs stopped just short of the pond.

"I told you they'd be sleepin' with the fish," Tommy said. "Get em outta there."

* * *

A half an hour later, one of the thugs emerged from the surface in a diving suit.

"I see the cart boss, but the Team is gone!"

"Where the hell they did go?" Tommy shouted angrily.

* * *

The five sopping wet men jumped over the fence that circled the perimeter of the resort and found themselves on a freeway.

Hannibal stepped out into the street and waved down the first car that came along, a white van.

The door slid open, and they found themselves greeted by a group of men in Elvis costumes.

"Say, you boys you like you're in T-R-O-U-B-L-E! Need a lift?"

"Where you heading?" Hannibal said.

"To the airport."

"I ain't gettin' on no plane!"

"Don't worry man," an Elvis said calmingly to B.A. "We wouldn't be cruel ... to a heart that's true ..."

"Slide over boys," said another Elvis. "There's room for a couple more at the Heartbreak Hotel!"

They jumped in the van and drove away.

* * *

An hour later, a green MP car kicked up dust as it rolled to a stop at a gas station surrounded by desert.

Colonel Decker and Captain Crane stepped out and walked over to the attendant.

"Have you seen these men?" he sad gruffly, holding a wanted poster bearing Hannibal, B.A. and Face.

"Yeah I seen 'em," the attendant said. "They stopped in for a fill-up. They were with a bunch of guys dressed like Elvis. The one with the mohawk bought a carton of milk."

"Which way they go?"

"That way," the attendant said, pointing. "Toward the airport."

"Just what I thought," Decker said. "You're mine, Smith."

With minutes Decker and his MPs burst into the terminal of the airport, guns drawn, only to find the place was completely full of people dressed as Elvis. A banner hung on a wall read, "Welcome Elvis Convention."

Decker put away his piece, realizing the search for Smith would be an exercise in futility.

Sam helped Hannibal, Face and Murdock drag B.A. onto a plane. Dressed in Elvis costumes, they were indistinguishable.

"That spiked peanut butter and banana sandwich did the trick," Hannibal said to one of the Elvises who'd driven him to the airport. "We can't thank you enough for flying us out of here either."

"Hey man, I'd be a real hound dog if I sent you boys back to do the jailhouse rock."

Shortly after the plane took off, Sam's phone rang.

"Yeah, Tony!" he said excitedly. "It's really me! ... What? ... Oh, no ... All right, I'll give them the news ... I'll see you when I can." Tony hung up the phone. "I've got bad news guys. My brother says Tommy managed to buy out the Youth Center. There's a construction crew ready to tear the place down."

"Say, where's this plane heading anyway?" Hannibal asked the Head Elvis.

"Why we're headin' right to the Vegas Strip to do our act," he said, grabbing a parachute. "We're the Flyin' Elvises!"

"It's a darn shame," Hannibal said. "If we could only get back to Los Angeles somehow, we might be able to stop those thugs in time and save the Youth Center."

The Head Elvis turned to his comrades. "Looks like these boys are in a tight spot. I think we need to ask ourselves, what would The King do?'

With a few moments, "All Shook Up" was heard from the heavens as the plane did a U-Turn toward Los Angeles.

* * *

"You can't do this!" shouted Clarence, the elderly man who ran the Youth Center, shaking his fist at the mafia thugs who stood before a demolition crew complete with bulldozer and wrecking ball. "These kids have no place else to go! I won't let you tear it down just to put up that monstrosity!" he said, pointing at the flatbed truck upon which sat the giant mechanical head of a mouse.

"Look old man," said a mafia thug in a hard hat, "We've got Eminent Domain. That means you can say goodbye to this dump, and hello to Merry Mouse, or you can be a permanent part of the foundation.

A black Cadillac pulled into the lot followed by a police car. Douglas and Tommy stepped out.

"What's the hold-up? You were supposed to have broken ground already!"

"This guy refuses to leave," Tommy's underling said.

"Officer, get him out of here!" Douglas said haughtily, pointing to Clarence.

"You can't do this!" Clarence said.

"I'm sorry Clarence," the officer said, escorting Clarence away.

"Well?" Tony shouted at the crew. "What are you standing around for?"

The crane, bulldozer and wrecking ball machine all growled to life and inched toward the Youth Center.

Meanwhile, a short distance away, B.A. awoke from his slumber, yawned and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, and quickly realized that he was parachuting toward the ground dressed in an Elvis coustume. "_HANNIBAAAAAAAL!_"

One of the mobsters, the same one B.A. had thrown into the trash back at the lemonade stand, heard the shout and looked up to see B.A. land upon him, tackling him to the ground.

The mobster grabbed a gun of the ground with his right hand and scrambled to his feet. He meant to aim the gun at B.A.'s face, but B.A. grabbed the mobster's left hand, then punched the mobster in the stomach. B.A. ripped the gun out of the thug's left hand, then grabbed his collar with his left and his stomach with his right. "You suckas never learn!" B.A. growled, as he threw the thug several yards into a refuse bin.

Murdock stared down at his feet as he carefully maneuvered himself to land on the roof of the bulldozer. The bulldozer driver heard the thud and looked to his left and right, bewildered. Murdock carefully crept behind the driver's compartment, then inched over to the driver's right. Murdock slid his arm behind the driver's neck and tapped his left shoulder. The driver distractedly looked to his left, and Murdock quickly siezed the distraction to climb in through the right and push the driver out.

Face tried to pull the same maneuver on the crane, but he bumblingly missed the roof of the driver's compartment and ended up getting his parachute stuck on the hook of the crane.

Another black Cadillac rolled into the lot. Four thugs got out of the car with machine guns and quickly fired upon B.A.

B.A. grabbed the gun dropped by the thug upon which whom he'd landed. He tried to return fire as he took cover behind a pile of steel beams.

Reinforcements came as Hannibal descended, machine gun blazing. Sam fell to the ground not far behind. They had to take cover behind the beams however, as they were clearly outnumbered. Hannibal provided cover fire just long enough for Sam to join B.A. behind the steel beams, and then Hannibal followed.

"These guys mean business," Sam said worriedly.

"So do we," Hannibal said. "Hey B.A.," he added, pulling a grenade out of a side pocket, "Why don't you send these a Hunk of Burning Love ..."

B.A. stood up and threw the grenade at the four thugs' Cadillac, causing an explosion from which they all took cover.

Hannibal saw that Murdock had stopped the bulldozer, but the wrecking ball machine still pressed forward, as did the crane from which Face dangled helplessly.

"B.A., get that crane!"

B.A. nodded, then ran toward the moving crane and jumped onto it's side, then climbed up to the driver's compartment.

The driver looked B.A. up and down.

"Who are you supposed to be?"

"What kind of stupid question is that, fool? I'm Elvis! Now beat it. Before you get Returned to Sender!"

"We're in over our head." Douglas said to Tommy.

Tommy nodded. "Let's get to the car."

They ran to their car, which was parked behind the flatbed. Before they could near it, however, they were suddenly surrounded by warning shots from Hannibal, who stood in front of the Merry Mouse head, with Sam lingering close behind.

"Sorry to spoil the party guys," Hannibal said, "But the cat's out of the bag. We've got evidence of all the dirty deals you two rodents have pulled to clear out this neighborhood. The next time you two gamble, it'll be for cigarettes at the State Pen."

B.A. approached in the crane, hoisting a bundle of bullet-ridden steel beams. "This is for my van, suckas!" B.A. shouted as the steel beams fell onto Tommy's Cadillac, flattening it.

At that moment, B.A.'s black van rolled into the lot. Tony stepped out of the van, and Sam rushed to meet him again. "It's good to see you again," Tony said warmly.

"I know how you feel," B.A. said, looking over his prized set of wheels. "You got it fixed up real good, man!"

"It was the least I could do," Tony said.

"And now," Hannibal said, jumping off the flatbed, "for the coupe de grace. He gave the thumbs up to face, who was behind the controls of the wrecking ball. Face pulled the lever, and the ball swung furiously into the face of the giant mechanical mouse, turning it into a pile of twisted metal.

"If it's any consolation," Face said to Douglas and Tommy as he joined the others outside, "it's always been my dream to build the better mouse trap."

"I'm glad I was here to see it," Murdock said to Face warmly.

"You gonna be seein' stars if you don't get in," B.A. said, starting up van.

Sirens were heard in the distance.

"I think that's your ride, fellas," Hannibal said to Douglas and Tommy smugly. "Don't drop the soap," Hannibal added as he climbed into the van, and closed the door, then opened it slightly and popped his head out one more time to say "thank you ... thank you very much ..."

* * *

Sam and Tony served another pizza to the kids at the Youth Center while Hannibal and Face looked over the newspaper front page, featuring a photo of Douglas and Tommy in prison garb.

"I guess what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas," Face mused.

"I'm just glad they're going to real prison," Hannibal added, "not some white collar resort."

"Thanks for the free lunch," B.A. said to Tony and Sam. "The kids are enjoying it."

"They're also enjoying Murdock's puppet show," Tony said.

_"What_?" B.A. shot back annoyedly.

B.A. cut through a crowd of kids to where Murdock was crouched behind a puppet booth, animating his pasta figurine.

"I told you I ain't gettin' on no plane," Murdock said in an exaggeratedly sheepish tone as he shook B.A.'s pasta figurine.

"You'll have to stay behind then," Murdock said again, attributing a deep, confident to his own character. "I'll take it from heEEEEEEY, B.A.!"

B.A. had pulled his feet abruptly. "You like to fly?" Murdock fumbled for words. "Delta's ready when you are, sucka!"

B.A. lifted up Murdock and threw him out an open window, then slammed the window shut behind. "Arrivaderci, fool!"

FIN


End file.
